StarFire : Chapter Two

The greek letter : α

-May I see your clearance, Sir?, the security guard asks.

I hand him my ID and my clearance.

-Very well, Sir. Proceed to Gate A.

I proceed to Gate A. When I arrive to Gate A, I hear familiar voices.

-Well, Eire, you’re back! How Jennifer? - Klepacki asks. My face spoke before my mouth, because his wide smile is all gone now and he becomes worried.

-Damm…Sorry Jim… Me and Nina were almost confident that things would get along with you two…

He tried to force a smile.

- Secrets in a relationship tends to destroy it, right? - I ask.

His face becomes inexpressive. He mumbles something that seems to be a yes. I wasn’t hearing him at all… I was thinking of Jennifer and of the secrets that I’ve kept from her.

This had to happen, sooner or later…

-Well, Jim… We must go! Just put the ID and let’s go… - Klepacki says.

-You’re right, Frank. Let’s go. – I reply.

An elevator. We get in. All seems void for me. I can’t focus. I can’t forget her face when I told her the truth. She couldn’t stand it. She became pale, crying. She started to mumble and become furious. She called me things that my common sense have already labelled me.

Klepacki is beside me.

Quiet.

Very Quiet.

He’s thinking…

Furiosly…

Whatever happened… It’s serious… Too serious…

StarFire : Chapter Three

ASTRA LUX

Come, man. We must head in for a debriefing. Look, I didn’t talk on the phone about this, but this is as serious as it may get. Very critical shit. I’m going to fill you in on the problems. – Klepacki said.

I hear him, and I start to focus. My mind starts to disentangle herself of the pain. Suddenly I’m focused. I start to think on what Klepacki says. I start to understand the problems. I started to realize that this isn’t a just a critical problem. It’s a political problem, the kind that sends shivers down the spine.

I head in the room. I see familiar faces, and the most disgusting of them all : General O'Hara.

It's hard to believe that some men are born just to kill other man. I've been always told that war isn't about killing : It's about manipulating. Sun Tzu used to say that. War can be won mentally, by subversion. But many men think that killing send the message : The Ultimate Message... I hate him... And knowing that my knowledge gave this man, a ruthless man, a unintelligent man, the power to kill other men, makes me sick...

It's my secret...I work my life to bring death...

StarFire : Chapter One

The Room

After one or two cups of coffee, I finally relaxed.

It wasn’t just a question of trying to forget what happened in the last two months, with me and Jennifer.

No…

No, it wasn’t just that.

I relax, and the sound of my spirit is incoherent. A greatly doped happiness and pain appear.

Guilt. Sorrow. Fear. Fascination.

Dreams come true.

Hope.

Human.

Human is the part that I most fear. Every time in History was characterized by it: Human, or, putting it in a more clear way, inhumanity and insanity. The desire for power and for a cutting-edge thing, that gives someone a great feeling of power. For how many times has Mankind been deprieved of technology that could save it, and used it to kill itself? And at the price of how many dreams killed at birth? Sakharov was an interesting figure, when he told that never in history did war and privation made so much for the development of science and technology.

By however insane it may look, he wasn’s wrong…

My name is James. James Welch. My great grandparents where immigrants, who’ve fled Ireland in the late XIX century, in the great potato famine that dizimated thousands. As unbelievable at it may seem, I’ve lived my entire life in a country, where I’ve borned, where I’ve lived, where my entire life took place, and my soul always wanted to go home, to Ireland. Whenever I’m here, I want to be there, and feel my ancestrality. Whenever I’m there, I want to be here, with the people I love. I’m a divided man that hasn’t been able to crack his internal frontiers down.

But that is about to finish…

I spoke of me, but I haven’t yet spoke of who I am. I’m a scientist, specialized in Optics. A physicist.

It’s 4:50 AM.

I look through a window. Jennifer is not here. I look at her bedside. No. She’s not here. She’ll never be here. If I only lived in ignorance… but would I be happy if I lived in ignorance? I wouldn’t, would I? Would I live in remorse? I could still have her if I lived in ignorance…

A phone rings.

My heart beats strongly.

I answer it.

No. Ignorance would only make things wrong. This phone call reminded me why. I must get dressed. I must go back. It has begun…

Acknowledgments

This Blog is called StarFire. It's a book I'm writing about a scientist. How his life gets entangled due to his work. It's a novell. I'm actually writing this because someone gave me the necessary inspiration for that. I want to acknowledge Timo Vuorensola for that inspiration, and for the interesting conversation we've had about that. And also to Mr. PEA for the delightful idea of BE WHAT YOU WANNA BE!

:)

For both of you, my deepest thanks!

I wish to be futurist, but i believe that the Future is something you can confirm with piece of paper and pencil... None of the technology that will be described here is beyond today's possibility...